My Umrah Story Part III- Journey to Makkah al Mukarramah

I am still trying my best to finish up the story of my Umrah Journey...caught up with works and stuff.. Plus my son is not that well... Well let us try to finish it this time..


According to schedule.. we will be going to Makkah on the Friday, which will be  on the New Year itself! But don't have much excitement of New Year celebration here.. its just another Friday at Madinah. But the view.. Subhanallah ..Mashallah... We had to do Wida' /or last visit to the Masjid Nabawi/ Makam Rasullah. Like saying Goodbye to Rasullah and this beautiful place.. I was crying again, and hope that I have the chance to come again here..

This is Qubah to mark that Our Beloved Prophet is Resting In Peace here..
I prayed and prayed coming back here again

Makam Baqi' from far..we can't really going there at this time..since everybody is busy setting up for Friday prayer. (Notice tak byk sedara Papa hahahaha)

We prayed outside just to enjoy some magnificient view  outside.. It was beautiful Friday afternoon, looks hot, but its soo windy outside.

We manage to capture the scene "Bukak Payung"...

The view of Masjid Nabawi from far.. Masha Allah

Another view.. (Subhanallah)

Then after Prayers, we back to hotel and ready to start our journey to Makkah!At this point we are in our Ihram,..

We reached hotel at 11pm, and after putting our bags, had some late dinner, we straight away head to Masjidil Haram. My heart beat so fast when I approach to Haram.. since this is my first time here! Never been this close to the Kaabah and having this magnificent view. Allah is the Great! My tears pouring again, and our first tawaf went smoothly, with big spaces!. I have the chance to close and touch and pray at Makam Ibrahim few times, and touch the Kaabah.Allahu.. I can't describe the feelings I had. We even manage to find spot in front of Multazam to pray.

Bir Ali-This is where we start to niat Ihram here ..

We reach Makkah at 12 pm.. makan2 letak bag..terus gerak ke Baitullah

Perasaan yg penuh debaran..tatkala melihat kawasan Baitullah dari luar..

Allahu..this is how Kaabah looks like..all this while tgk tv je.. Macam tak caya its depan mata..

Can't believed I am standing in front of Kaabah

 After finish our Tawaf.. We went for Saie.. Again..cried and cried since I remembered the story how Siti Hajar tried to find water/food for her son, runs around between Safa and Marwah..and cried when I read the Du'a .. I am embracing every single moment doing the Saie. Finished the Saie, you finished with Tahallul. (Cutting your hair a little bit, for man they will usually bold their head). In my case I don't have hair.. so just some shaving act.. which 1 arabic kids looked at me with his mouth wide open.. aaaa hahahahahhah...

Starting our Walk between Safa' and Marwah... U can see the crowd..

The famous 'Big Clock'

When the whole process is finished, its almost Subuh..we stayed for Subuh..and went back to hotel. I can't feel my legs at that point...too much walking. after some rest, got the energy to go back again and doing your prayers there. The excitement of doing tawaf everyday, iktikaf inside the Masjidil haram, it such a beautiful things to do. You never feel bored. Every day I will have the chance to go different level, or side of the Masjidil Haram, just to feel the different.. And I felt happy all the time. Sometimes I don't even know where all the strength came from.. but I had all..with the good health..I managed to do 2nd Umrah.. which at first I don't even think about it, cause of my health or afraid don't have any energy to do it again. But He knows it all. Subhanallah.

Assalamualaikum semua,,

We prayed Zuhr at 2nd level of Tawaf area.. and it was hot.. but Allah is the Greatest.. immediately the sun is covered and we can sense the Miracle, when all of us there cried non-stop, and non-stop Praising Him for His Ni'mat

View from 2nd level

Resting..

We had the visit as well here, went to Jabbal Al Tsur, Jabbal Annur (Gua Hira') and JabbalArrahmah (where Adam and Hawa is believed to have their meeting here). Some funny stories, I have tried to climb the Hill..yess meee! haha..but just did it half way, coz suddenly feel ridicilous climbing with the Abaya..(selak sana sini) hahahahaha. And from the top took few pic and 1 Arabic lady asked to take photo of her as well. And suddenly I have became her official photographer with few weird pose(like praying pose, or climbing pose) from her. "for facebook", she said. I just play along, but passed the phone quickly when I have noticed it went far. haha..

In front of Jabal Tsur

In front of Jabal Rahmah

I climbed half way.. and realized how silly I am.. peace! 

All in all I had such a blast with my visit.. and I have noticed whatever you think or wish.. it immediately came true there.. like how I wish to have lontong, and butter chicken in Makkah.. and I had it.. Masha Allah.. I am not fancy of Arabic food that much.. and  end up here too I don't really fancy to go to get any of Mandi or Khabsah here.. But when it come to sambal belacan,, lauk melayu.. my eyes all twinkling and bersinar.. hahahahaaha.. (dah lidah melayu tu nak buat mcm mana)

Every great thing will always come to end..which makes me feels so devastated.. the last day of our stay in Makkah.. We will need to do the tawaf wida' (to say Goodbye.. and wish that we will be back here). I am bringing mak.. (My brother's future mom in law with me). We are doing tawaf slowly.. and its so hearbreaking to say goodbye.. That time I just wish that we have the chance to be here again..all of us..the whole family..

As the bus is leaving the Makkah area.. our tears non-stop falling.. I am surely missing all this.. We reached Jeddah by 4pm.. and we had our Prayer at Masjid Terapung..(Masjid near by the sea).
We had our rest..and view by the sea is so beautiful.

We reached  Jeddah Airport by 6 something.. and the waiting and process takes some times. Our flight is at 11pm. The funny part, the airport officer asked us to queue to the waiting area, but there is flight before us where the passengers is still strungling to get in. The funny thing is.. it seems out of control that the officer can't do anything to dicipline these people. Believed me Malaysian people are more civilized and patience in terms of queueing and waiting. we give them chance to go first since their flight is about to go. The flight is at 9pm.. and the time was 9.30 and they are still queueing, some of them just reached. And the officer can't do anything.

Alhamdulillah its all went smoothly when it comes to our turn. My target to just sleep.. which is what has happened.. I slept all the time in the flight and only woke up when I am about to reach KL.

When I reached Malaysia.. for few nights I cried..coz I miss Makkah & Madinah so much.. I can't describe how I feel. But I miss Haram Land dearly.

Sahil's 1st day at School

Yes, it his first day at school today. Yeah, I registered him a bit late coz of I just back from my Umrah, and by the time I am back weeks has gone. So decided to enroll him on Feb.

The thing is.. he is so relax. I couldn't believe he is doing fine. I guess I am overreacted about how he will be in school.. Teacher said he cried a little, I think that when he feel restless or a bit scared of something. But the fact he is behaving so well shocked me. Never underestimate your child. They can be so independence at any point of time, and I really need to let go my Clingy Mom syndrome.

Umrah Story Part II

Sambungan from the previous post...

Some might says.."Ala.. awat yg tak caya dapat pergi Umrah pon.. ada duit pergi lah". Believe me.. its never about the money! You have all the money in the world, but when  your heart is not there.... then it wont happen. Or you don't have much money, but your heart is dying to go there, Allah will give you the way! Which in this case that would be me. Thanks to my brother, and Ukhwah Firdausi Travel for this great opportunity!

It less than a month after my chemo, when I decided to go for Umrah. I don't want to tell my Doc, (takut dia tak berapa kasi I pergi..hi hi). This time my heart says I want it badly, and if anything happened to me, or anything related to my health, I live it to Allah. Mama kind a worried, but she is more excited to see me going.

On the day itself, I am still not fully recovered from my cough n flu. Amazingly, the moment I step in the Madinah Airport, I don't have any of it. And it continues until I came back. Basically I am perfectly healthy. I walked a lot (estimated 800 -1000 calories burned everyday), I did experience some back pain, or pain on legs after finished my Umrah(due to long walking distance), and some tiredness I had when I am fasting and doing tawaf at the same time. But it never stops me. Alhamdullilah. My heart keeps praying for the smoothness of everything, and He grants it!

Continue with our visit to Raudhah on the next day, I heard about Du'a in Raudhah, but can't imagine how its look like, or what should I do in Raudhah per say. So.. I am kind a just followed what our group is doing or directed. And with no understanding of where to go. (my earlier understanding on Raudhah is some place outside Masjid Nabawi like a beautiful garden - Since raudhah means heaven on earth or "taman syurga", later that I know it is another special prayer place in Masjid Nabawi)

Before Raudhah..

It has such a big group of people going to Raudhah, from different countries. It seems they let go all this Middle East Group to go first, then the group from Malaysia and Indonesia.  It is so crowded, with people pushing all over. I keep praying Rabbi Assir wala tu assir.. and it seems smooth to me. When we reached the Raudhah ( I don't know at that time we have reached). People seem to push each other to pray at this specific place,. I was standing there, and not quite understand what's going on. The group of Arabic lady praying and sitting there, and since so many groups of people, and some tends to push people around, I was so worried I might felt in this Arabic group.

Then the Ustazah of our group said, " okay we pray here!", And Datin Fiza told me "We need to pray on green carpet",  I still  don't understand why the green carpet? Later that we know, actually we are praying on it, and I realized that when I first sujud. And then I got to know if you are on the green carpet, its in Raudhah, and the most mustajab place for doa.

Raudhah -Green Carpet, Outside Raudhah - Red Carpet

I was crying all out, and grateful with the opportunity I had at Raudhah.

I don't have really take much photo  in the Raudhah, since need to be careful with the security lady and had been warned by Ustazah, and at that point of time, you just think about your prayer and non-stop Du'a.

After visiting Raudhah.

Outside the Raudhah area

My gang when I am there..

While waiting for others.. me & Datin Fiza...

After Raudhah, we went for shopping outside. And such a funny thing to do bargaining with those sellers. Sampai mengucap everytime we asked for rock bottom price. And everytime sees us.. Malaysia banyak bagus.. Gratis.. Actually they trying to say we are so generous or in other words, "Kaki Shopping"! hahaha...


It is another day in Madinah.. we went for visit to few places in Madinah, such as Masjid Quba' , the first Masjid that Prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h built when he first came to Madinah. I had such amazing story here. I had lost from my group since I went to take wudhu'. And its full of people in the Masjid, and need to squeeze yourself in to find a place. And, people start pushing each other so bad that the Arab lady is screaming out loud. I just looked from far, and squeeze myself to other side easily, and the next thing I know I saw my group praying in 1 corner, with large space. I found them! I utilized every single moment to pray in there and sujud syukur. Also crying non-stop..The feeling of humbleness, amazement with His creation, and how I have enjoyed every single moment here. (yeah.. I have been crying a lot since I first step in here).

When we went out, the craziness starts again...pushing each other. Lucky for us, I have saw a Pakistani guy, to give me ways for me and my maks... and he and his friend block others and give us way..Alhamdulilah..

The beautiful view of Masjid Quba'

Beautiful view inside the masjid..

My Adik Sayang..

Then we went to Dates Farm, just to see how it is look like...

You can taste./ makan as much as you want..

I look weird in this pic

 Next, we just passed by the Jabal Uhud, which is a bit upset, since the driver do not want to stop to Jabal Uhud, since we have lost a lot of time at the Dates Farm

Frust..dia by pass ke kat Jabal Uhud..

By pass je..kat area masjid Qiblaitain

.

And after that we went to some market to buy all this dates and nuts for our frens and family. (sorry no pic)

My UMRAH Story Part 1

Yes, I had just came back from umrah last Friday.

And this is not something that I have planned, and its all last minute decision. I have prayed to Allah all this while to give me chance to go to Holy Place one day, and I am still feel disbelief how its has been granted, so sudden, so smooth and dipermudahkan. Masha Allah.

When I have decided to follow my brother, (God bless him), its left around 10days to get myself prepared with the journey. I am so scared since I do not know much about Umrah and Hajj, what to do, what to bring? But from here I have left every single thing to Allah, let Him show me the way, and May everything is an ease on me. And I have not telling people, cause I still not too sure about Visa issue, and vaccine and everything. My visa is granted on 28th and I am flying on 29th. Macam tak caya.. tapi bila Allah dah hantar jemputan, segalanya mungkin.


Bermula lah perjalanan kami..

My Kesayangan - yang si Sahil happy lak dia Ammi nk tinggalkan dia. (but actually he don't even cry at all)

Bye bye my kesayangan.. Ammi gonna miss you guys

I have new 'Mak''

Yup..we about to go now

Madinah Airport

The first Pic I had of Masjid Nabawi.. Subhanallah

I can't believed I am here..and the scenery is so beautiful..

The interior that made me go aaaaa...

First selfie in front of Masjid Nabawi..

The ladies entrance

MashaAllah..Subhanallah

 When I had my first Subuh prayer.. I still feel disbelief with what I have witnessed. In my heart I have said millions of Syukur for giving me the chance of being at this magnificient place. I can't tell how thankful I am. And can't describe the feelings I had, Amazed, Thrill, Excited, Scared, Thankful, Happy, and the experience I had is beyond of any place that I have been so far, nothing compared to this.

Final Chemo & treatment for the Year!

My 6th and last chemo happened on the 1st week of December..

I am sooo a excited, all the mixed feeling, to think that this will be my final nightmare. I just can't wait to end all this. Whoever has gone through chemo period, knows how nightmare it is the whole experience. And I am all dressed up to celebrate the fact that all this will be over soon!


But its never being easy for me. At this very last session, my nurse break the news that my red count is so low, and I am not enough of iron? So, they don't want to proceed the chemo, until my oncologist said so. I was soo worried, if they said they have to postpone it. And I don't want to prolong my agony of these chemo experience. "Please Allah", I prayed, with non-stop reciting 1 part of ayat "La Ila ha Illa anta, Subhanakailmi, Kumtum minazzolimin" (Ayat to recite when you are in trouble).

Then doctor said, just proceed, seems physically I look all well. They will just have to take extra pre -caution later. Alhamdulillah.

The next day, I went again for some celebration for cancer patients..But to me its more like to celebrate my final treatment. Glad to see some familiar faces. And hope there will be more celebration to go. InshaAllah

The effect of final chemo is worst this time. (I guess, since immune system already at 0 level, so it will just make everything extra worst). Numbness, body ache, vomiting(something I never experience before this),and numbness until I can't feel my face. (until now in fact). And don't talk about hairs. Every single possible hairs on my body are all gone. I don't even have eye lashes now, and have to wear specs, to cover all dust that came through my eyes. But I do feels  my skin  soft and smooth, like a baby. They said that;s also the effects of chemo. (the only 1 good effect I guess).

And few days after the chemo, my husband fall sick. He got fever, lost appetite, body aching. I can sense its more like dengue. Keep telling him to drink more water, and my making and effort to do the papaya leaves juice for him. And yet, he don't drink it. And its all wasted. Hu hu hu.

Its has been long cuti for Selangor people.. Due to Sultan's Birthday and Selangor won the Malaysia Cup, and yet my whole weekend spent with back and forth to hospital. hu hu hu.

And soon after that, I fall sick. I guess because of me spending my time more in hospital, and with all germs and bacteria.. and with no defense system in my body,, of course..huhu

My cough sounds so bad, that people look at me scary.. and I really hope can get all recovered before my trip. My trip to where? Insha Allah I will reveal to you soon,, if all goes smoothly with Allah permit.

Till then.. Illalliqaaaa''''( See you soon)


AmmiSahil

My Chemo Diary - Part V

Its my 5th cycle of chemo, and it has been quite hectic week for me.

First, the messed up schedule.
I was not aware that my chemo schedule has been set a day earlier, until I saw the date on my appointment book. I have planned it well to have it days before Deepavali, so that I can have long break, and rest. Buuuuttt the nurse has messed up with the date, that cause me to have to reschedule the chemo, and apart from that whatever I have planned for my work all messed up. And to reduce the stress I had hubby suggested to go for short trip, just to makes me feels better. Hu hu..thanks hubby.

Runcing je tgn tu nak ambil Stobewi Ammi.. he he he

Muka sama tak.. :P

Anak Papa

 <3 familia

So I have to do it last Friday, with few days apart from my trip to Kemaman. Allahu.. I prayed for everything goes smoothly, hope nothing bad happened, The journey, the presentation and all. Alhamdulillah.. nasib baik all went well, apart from the scary hujan lebat.

Sky so clear..this is before heavy rain from Karak all the way to KL..

On top of that, I have to pay in full for my previous chemo session, because of the changed of date I have requested previously. Duit terbang lagi! Hadoih.. Nasib boleh claim..


The side effects is still the same.. and so much of body aching, since I have to travel to Kemaman. I don't even have all the energy.. I am seriously pushing my body to the limit. Dengan si bujang kecik meragam pulak. Nampak kita semua tak kena. Nak manja..nak pujuk.. Dengan Omma dia je elok je.. haih la anak. He can be so much understanding, especially when I looked sick, but sometimes he can just be so much clingy too.  This morning I have told him I have to go to work. His reply " Ammi, don't go to work, stay with me". I wish I can Sayang..huhu.. Ammi with all the sickness still work like crazy. I love working. It makes me content. But my energy level really goes down the drain. Hu Hu..Ya Allah...Permudahkan lah Segala Urusan

Another Sad note, my friend that I have mentioned earlier in my previous post. She passed away on my chemo day. It was very sad news, up to the level I cried to myself, and thinking if next is me, am I ready? I feel soo empty. I wanted to pay my last respect, but the chemo itself has taken a lot of me. I just can wish that Allah will grant her Jannah, and forgive all her sins. She is a great person to most people, and I believed she got her part to die in Husnul Khotimah. Insha Allah.


Another note.. happy birthday to my beloved sister, Nur Amalina. or my son called her Ana, Nana. May your life filled with happiness, and Barakah from Allah S.W.T.  Love you so much Sis.

You know I love you so much Na..no matter what